My sister emailed me on Wednesday. "20 years ago today I graduated from college. wow..." Wow indeed. It seems like just yesterday we dropped her off at school, heading home to a house quiet with the loneliness a parent feels watching their first-born leave the nest and a sister trying to figure out how to be a daughter now that she was an "only" child.
What struck me more about her email was that is made me focus on the time of year...tomorrow my students will celebrate their prom. I chaperone every year. I love it! Quite frankly, it's a heck of a lot more fun going to their prom than any of my own. It's wonderful to see them all dressed up like the adults they will be in just a few short years. They feel beautiful and special and their faces show this. It's quite amazing to witness.
As I was talking with some seniors on Wednesday about their dates and tuxedos and gowns, they referred to last year's prom. "You were there, right?" they asked. I started to say, "Yes, I go every year" when I realized, No, I wasn't there last year. I was at home. Recovering.
From my last pregnancy. My final miscarriage. My final loss.
Wow...has it really been a year? In some ways, it feels like just yesterday. In other ways, it feels like a lifetime ago. After our downward spiral from our third loss, we felt moved to try treatment again. Again we did. Again we failed. Up, down, up, down.
Just recently, we have in some wayscome to terms with the hand we have been dealt. I have started to take inventory of our baby items and have begun planning ways to dispose of them. We receive word of new pregnancies and just give one another that, "Seriously???" look. But overall, we're moving on. Moving along...
Still, to be reminded of the date, the time, the emotions.
Wow indeed...
